List off

You know that website I previously quoted that said men can’t possibly be thinking about sex all time because they’re also thinking about sports, food and work? Well, according to other websites, when men think about those things, they’re being romantic.

The website says a survey of 2,000 people conducted by a British e-tailer determined that “cooking a meal without being asked” and “listening about her day at work” are the top two things a fellah can do to convey his hunka hunka burnin’ love.

And a columnist for Yahoo’s Associated suggested that gals who want to show their affection would do well to spring for a couple of tickets to a sporting event.

Damn. This is easier than it seems. Until you look a little closer.

Newslite’s survey produced two lists: “Odd Things Men Think Are Romantic” and “What Women Actually Find Romantic.”

You know what’s coming: The lists don’t mesh very well.

For one thing, men think ironing, taking out the garbage, vacuuming, picking up and doing laundry are romantic. None of that, it turns out, gets women’s juices flowing. They want that hot meal.

Seriously. Cooking—and without being asked—is the only chore on the distaff list. Still, I can’t imagine a man will make his lady feel more loved by doing less work around the house.

Also, women in the survey didn’t seem too impressed by men who’ll watch chick flicks and let them control the TV remote. Ways a dude can score points, the dudettes said, included offering to watch the kids so she can shop, holding the door for her when she’s heading out to the mall and making her a mix tape during the time intervening.

Not of songs he thinks she’d like. Of her favorite songs. Bonus if the mix tape is an anniversary present.

“The worrying thing,” Newslite said, “is husbands and boyfriends actually think they’re being romantic when they let their partner watch their favourite soap on TV, but they’re just being courteous.”

Being courteous isn’t romantic? Isn’t holding a door for someone also being courteous? Hell, I do that for people I’ve never met and have no intention of ever being romantically involved with.

The Associated Content column has a different take on the subject, telling women what they should do if they want to send romantic signals to their men. The No. 1 tip is “leave a cute note” on his clipboard so he’ll see it at work or jammed into his wallet to find when he’s paying for his morning latte on the way.

That’s fine. But in the Newslite survey, “leave a cute note” is something “Women Actually Find Romantic.” It didn’t make the men’s list.

It almost seems as if these two sources are suggesting that if women want to do things that men find romantic, they should be cooking, vacuuming and do the laundry.

Man, I do not want to go there. Why don’t we just say it’s nice when people do nice things for each other and leave it at that?

And when people do nice things for people they love, maybe that’s what romantic is all about.

(P.S. Mary Jo—please leave a comment telling all these wonderful ManWARriors that I cook, vacuum and do the laundry—and am willing to watch a home decorating show now and then, as long as I get to keep the remote.)

2 thoughts on “List off”

  1. Dave, does your P.S. count as a cute little note?

    Yup, Dave makes dinner every night (because he's a more discriminating diner than I am), vacuums (because flecks on the rug drive him crazy) and oversees the washer and dryer (which I'm not allowed to touch, lest I mess up his system).

    Oh, wait, he does all that to be romantic? Someone should have told me.

    But I see the romance when he saves a newspaper article he thinks I'd like, fills the gas tank before I have to drive, and cleans up the mayhem I leave when I'm racing out the door.

    Not to mention DVRing–and watching with me–and *enjoying*–those home decorating shows.

    Yup, he's a romantic guy. Lucky me!

    Smooch, smooch.

  2. I've often thought that "Parents" magazine could do an article merge with "Maxim" on the benefits of Choreplay. The blend of the differing perspectives could be a fascinating idea. In fact, the more I think about this, I thinking I could develop a whole novel about this:)
    Thanks for an inspirational post.

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